Ways to Handle Sellers Who Avoid Discussing the Property Directly
Navigate avoidance gracefully while gathering what you need.

Austin Beveridge
Tennessee
, Goliath Teammate
Engaging with a seller who avoids direct conversations about their property can be challenging and sometimes discouraging. Whether you’re a buyer, agent, or investor, knowing how to navigate these delicate interactions is essential for gathering accurate information and moving the transaction forward. Below are proven strategies to help you obtain the details you need while maintaining a positive relationship with the seller.
When dealing with sellers who avoid discussing their property directly, begin by establishing genuine rapport. Ask open-ended questions to foster meaningful dialogue, and listen attentively to their responses and concerns. If they continue to deflect, gently guide the conversation back to specific property details, using their own answers as a springboard for further inquiry.
Building Rapport: The Foundation of Communication
If you find yourself dealing with sellers who are evasive about property details, it may be helpful to explore strategies outlined in How to Contact the Owner of a Property Effectively to facilitate more productive conversations.
Before delving into the specifics of the property, take time to build a personal connection. Sellers are often more forthcoming when they feel at ease and respected. Start with light conversation—perhaps ask about their motivations for selling or what they’ve enjoyed about living in the neighborhood. For example, you might say, "What first attracted you to this area?" or "How long have you lived here?" These questions create a comfortable atmosphere and naturally lead to deeper discussions about the property itself.
Using Open-Ended Questions
Open-ended questions are invaluable in these situations. Rather than asking, "Is the roof in good condition?" consider, "Can you describe any updates or repairs you’ve made to the roof over the years?" This approach encourages the seller to share stories and details, rather than limiting their response to a simple yes or no. For instance, "What improvements have you made since you moved in?" can reveal both recent renovations and ongoing maintenance issues.
Active Listening: A Key Skill
Active listening means giving your full attention to the seller’s words, rather than simply waiting for your turn to speak. Show that you’re engaged by paraphrasing their responses and asking follow-up questions. For example, if a seller mentions past plumbing issues, you might respond, "It sounds like plumbing has been a challenge. Could you tell me more about what happened and how it was resolved?" This not only demonstrates empathy but also encourages the seller to provide more comprehensive information.
Redirecting the Conversation
If the seller continues to avoid property-specific topics, it’s important to gently steer the discussion back on track. You might say, "I understand that selling can feel overwhelming. To make the process smoother for both of us, could you share the most significant improvement you’ve made to the home?" This keeps the conversation constructive and focused on the details you need, while acknowledging the seller’s feelings.
Checklist for Effective Communication
It can be helpful to reference resources like how to build a flip budget without ever walking the property for strategies that allow you to assess a property's potential without direct communication with the seller.
Establish rapport before discussing property details.
Use open-ended questions to encourage dialogue.
Practice active listening to validate the seller's concerns.
Redirect the conversation if they avoid specifics.
Be patient and give them time to open up.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
It’s important not to come across as confrontational or impatient. If a seller feels pressured or judged, they may become even more guarded. Avoid making assumptions about the property’s condition or the seller’s motivations; instead, ask clarifying questions to gain a true understanding of their perspective. For example, rather than assuming there are hidden issues, you might say, "Are there any aspects of the home you think a new owner should know about?" Lastly, don’t rush the process—building trust and openness often takes time, and pushing too hard can cause the seller to withdraw.
Frequently Asked Questions
What should I do if the seller is completely unresponsive?
If a seller remains unresponsive, consider changing your approach. Sometimes, giving them space and time can be effective. Follow up after a few days with a friendly, low-pressure message that reiterates your interest in the property and your willingness to assist them throughout the selling process.
How can I tell if a seller is hiding something?
Look for inconsistencies in their answers or responses that are unusually vague. If a seller frequently changes their story or avoids discussing certain topics, it could be a sign they are withholding information. In these situations, ask direct but non-confrontational questions, such as, "I noticed you mentioned different timelines for the roof repairs—could you clarify when those took place?"
Is it worth pursuing a seller who avoids discussions?
Yes, it can be worthwhile to continue engaging with a hesitant seller, especially if the property is otherwise attractive. Many sellers are simply anxious or unfamiliar with the selling process. By using effective communication techniques, you can help them feel more comfortable and may ultimately uncover valuable insights about the property.
What if the seller only wants to discuss price?
If the seller is focused solely on price, gently remind them that understanding the property’s features and condition is essential for determining a fair value. You might say, "I understand that price is important to you. To make sure we’re both on the same page, could you tell me more about the home’s recent updates or any maintenance that’s been done?" This approach highlights your collaborative intent and the importance of transparency.
How Goliath Helps You Apply This
Understanding the nuances of seller behavior can be challenging, especially when direct communication is off the table. By leveraging clean and organized real estate data, Goliath provides clarity and visibility that can illuminate the subtle signals sellers may not explicitly communicate. This enhanced understanding can guide you in navigating these complex interactions more effectively.
With Goliath's comprehensive data insights, you gain the confidence to make informed decisions earlier in the process. This proactive approach not only helps in anticipating potential challenges but also in crafting strategies that align with both market trends and individual seller tendencies, ultimately leading to smoother transactions and better outcomes.
